I just finished reading a book by Patrick King:
I don’t get any perks for linking to the book or reviewing it. Sigh. But I did enjoy it.
It’s short (yesssss!) and contains some excellent tips for interacting successfully with people.
(We all want that, right? I mean, some of us would rather sit at home with a book, but when we must interact, we don’t want it to be awkward or unpleasant.)
So, sharing chapter highlights may entice you to add it to your book list:
Chapter 1: Take ownership of the skills you have and the ones you need. Embrace the fact that it is your responsibility to improve your people skills, not everyone else’s.
Chapter 2: Find points of interests in others. To understand people, you need to know what drives them. They have a primary self-interest as well as other, more covert driving self-interests.
Chapter 3: Eliminate Toxic Social Habits. Mr. King lists several habits that interfere with good social interaction. Eliminating these will improve your social skills, even before you ever add new skills.
Chapter 4: Don’t judge people. We haphazardly put people into boxes, assuming what is not true. This interferes with understanding and can also offend people.
Chapter 5: Listen. Listen. Listen. Are you listening? Listening well is not a lazy, passive habit. Listening takes hard work when it’s done well. Listen to understand. Listen to dig deeper. Listening is rare, valuable, and builds trust and appreciation.
Chapter 6: Boost your emotional IQ. Understand your own emotions and you will better understand those that belong to other people.
Chapter 7: Belief Police. Some people feel it is their job to correct people. Even about mundane, unimportant things: “This is truly the best soap. No, it is. It is. Really. You are wrong. I am right and here is why…..”
Chapter 8: The Four Communication Styles: passive, aggressive, passive-aggressive, and assertive. Which one are you?
Chapter 9: Walk a mile in a person’s shoes. Find out what others are truly feeling. Build empathy toward people.
Chapter 10: Just. Shut. Up. When in doubt, close your mouth.
Chapter 11: Connect instantly with people. Work on the skills above, and truly care about people. Practice often.
Chapter 12: Workplace Tactics. Building skills like tact and appreciation will make the workplace work
“One of the most sincere forms of respect is actually listening to what another has to say.”
—Bryant H. McGill
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